Power of a Positive No

At the September Breakfast Meeting, Nancy Schnoebelen Imbs shared the "Power of a Positive No."
Based on the book by William Ury – Power of a Positive No

“Every important yes requires a thousand no's” - Warren Buffet

Saying "NO" is the biggest challenge.

There is risk associated with a no
Spoil relationship
Hurt feelings
Lost deal

The underlying power of a no:    
Typically, will reduce stress and anxiety
Allows for effective use of power
Creates healthier relationships

The dreaded “A” list to avoid the no response
  • Accommodate
    • Half of our problems today come from saying yes when we should be saying no
  • Attack
    • Using power without concern
      • “Speak when you are angry & you will make the biggest speech you will ever regret” – Ambrose Bierce
  • Avoid
    • Not saying yes and not saying no
      • “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter” – MLK
So how to say no
  • Prepare
    • go to the balcony; pause; regroup
    • What is your Anchor Phrase
      • I would prefer not to
      • This doesn't work for me
      • I'm not comfortable doing that
  • Develop a plan B
    • Propose a different option based on your core interests/needs
    • Use wisely and include education why it is a no
    • Do not waiver
    • Do it swiftly
  • End on a positive note
    • Acknowledge the truth of the difficulty
    • Thank the person
    • Focus on a positive future